I tried to escape you

But the orchestra played on.
Why can't I just let this all go?
She seems to just let is all escape her with one thought, where it's taken me over a year to get to where I am. I haven't gone anywhere from where I was a year ago in this situation, but I can't go the rest of my time with her go like this. I wish there was someone else I could talk to about how I really really feel, but she's the only one I can spill my heart out to and not feel like it's going to be in the news the next day. Honestly, this is really one of those times where I'm scared about what's going to happen to our relationship and it freaks me out because I don't even know how I want it to end up. All I know about it, is that I love her more than anyone knows.

On another note, I'm sick and tired of these people I don't even like trying to hit on me and make me call them and meet them at the movies. I wish I could be meaner and tell them that I'm not interested in them and I don't want to meet them, call them, or do anything that involves them. They really piss me off and they make me have an angry face.

Well anyways, there's this one girl (I won't use names, ever) and she's pretty darn amazing. I still have to go meet her at a concert in the 28th and I really can't wait. I don't talk to her as much as I would like to, but it's getting better. All I can think about now is meeting her, thanks to me writing about it. I can't really describe how I feel about her though. I'm a very complicated person, but it's probably because I have so many problems. I just really hope that what I'm saying doesn't ruin my friendship with her. I guess you could say I like her, but like I said before, it's a complicated thing. I still need to meet her, before I come to any type of conclusion.
But, I am the patron saint of lost causes.