16 April 2009

These streaked memories

Wash away in the rain?
No, they stay and scar.

Of course, so many poeple that were once important to my being, have left my life.
But honestly, it doesn't bother me as much as I initially thought it would.
I'm perfectly happy with who I am right now; if I was different, I wouldn't have the most amazing girlfriend I could ever ask for.
I probably wouldn't have the friends I do either, and I'm grateful I was able to turn myself into something successful for the time being.
Honestly, if you have a problem with who I am, I'm sorry.
I don't really care, I'm who I want to be, I don't want to be you.

And it doesn't matter what people say about me, I only care what I think about myself.
I only need one person other than myself to live a good life.
I can just drop everyone else.


Guess what it's about?

My horizon, a jagged line across my paper.
It bothers no one,
but confounds everyone.

It's a tear in my world
for the bad spirits to come visit me
in my dreams.

The sky is red
as I release this
work of art into the world;
Only to watch it fall into the sand.

The riot downtown
going uncontrolled.
No reason to stop,
they keep burning,
the piano keeps playing
the heart still beating
and bleeding on the floor.

Screaming your name into the streets
watching other's lives fall apart
as they are witnesses of this

This was perfect,
this was perfect.
What blanks out the eyes
of the one you used to love?
Nothing but the torture
coming up and screaming at you.

Help me stop
get rid of this
all of the fun I've had making you
hate who I've turned into.
The monster inside, just laughs
and looks the other way.

There's one way to
release your short lived life
of the images burned into your mind.
The pain, years of fighting for your life,
from your own scarred hands
it's never too much to handle.

Tell him I said hello.


  1. James you a wonderful person :]
    I loves you!
    I would love a cookie, but I'm afraid to guess what your poem is about :P
    Knowing me I'll get it wrong, so I'll just keep my thoughts to myself ;D


  2. i can't actually tell you what it means to you, only to me.
    and to me it means that...
    no one knows the extent of everything someone else has been through, has felt, has thought about. even though they want to know all your secrets...they don't actually care. everything seems to die over time, except bad memories and bad feelings which haunt you forever. you try to push them away and do things to get rid of them, but they seem to follow you everywhere, becasue they are a part of you. they make you who you are.
    When they don't go away, the weaker ones give in to the urge to end it all. after all the fighting to get rid of the images and thoughts, you are the one who held them there the whole time. living is never too much to handle. when you have the right reason. the right people to live for.
    so you will stay alive and fight, because you are strong. everything you go through makes you stonger. so to those who can not be as strong, tell HIM i said hello.

    i really love the first stanza and the last line the best